Traffic Cam CaperKarl's Version
by PerryThePlatypusFan
Summary: Karl the Intern's take on "Traffic Cam Caper". Twoshot and a screenplay. Possible alternate ending coming soon...


"Traffic Cam-Caper"

Karl's Version

A Screenplay By Brandie Delanie

KARL, NARRATING:

_Well, you've seen the episode "Traffic Cam-Caper". It was my record of appearances in a single episode. You saw it with Agent P getting the disk and Phineas and Ferb's rising suspicions about Norm. But I saw it as an uneasy wait for Agent P. It all started when we found out about the traffic cam…_

MONOGRAM:

Karl! You'd better see this.

KARL:

What is it?

**MONOGRAM shoves the newspaper at KARL**

NEWSPAPER:

NEW TRAFFIC CAM!

Installed right next to 347 Maple Drive, the new traffic cam has footage of almost everything for the past few weeks. It was installed at the beginning of the month, but it has already gotten footage of a man driving on the wrong side of the road. Police officer Martin Ward says, "Whoever was in that car was probably British. We've told him several times to drive on the _right_ side of the road, but he keeps forgetting." The cam has also gotten footage of several things like a rollercoaster, a backyard beach, a roller rink/giant loaf of bread, and a moon elevator. Once or twice, footage watcher Robert Russo has seen a platypus with a fedora. Doctors advise rest.

KARL:

WHAT THE HECK?!

MONOGRAM:

That's what I thought. How could they do that? I'm confused as to how they could install that thing by Agent P's house.

KARL:

Maybe these two idiots Jeff and Dan decided to--

MONOGRAM:

Never mind.

KARL:

You _never_ like my ideas.

MONOGRAM:

We'd better notify Agent P right away.

KARL:

He won't thank us for waking him up.

MONOGRAM:

Listen, I know it's late at night but we have no choice! We have to get rid of that footage!

KARL:I _still _say it was Dan and Jeff's fault!

MONOGRAM:

Before we tell Agent P, let's hear that stupid- er… interesting idea of yours.

KARL:

Okay. Maybe those two idiots Jeff and Dan decided to make this plot where they all of a sudden make this traffic-cam appear and pretend it was there for a while and have it have footage of Agent P so he has to get it and we end up tossing the disk in the trash!

MONOGRAM:

I thought I told you to stay away from coffee and sugar!

KARL:

Hmph!

**KARL storms out.**

**Scene goes to after they tell Agent P.**

**KARL is reading **_**Titanic **_**by Mary Pope Osbourne.**

MONOGRAM:

Karl?

KARL:

Aaaaah! The Titanic sank at 2:20 AM in 1912!

MONOGRAM:

Shut up! I was just gonna tell you to sit by the phone. In case Agent P calls.

KARL:

Er…yes, sir?

**KARL exits.**

MONOGRAM:

What am I _saying?!_ Platypuses can't talk!

**Scene goes to KARL, who is sitting by the floor, continuing to read his book.**

**KARL zones out, but the phone rings, snapping him out of his "book trance".**

KARL:

I'll get it!

**KARL answers the phone.**

KARL:

Hello?

TELEMARKETER:

Would you be interested in purchasing a Jonas Brothers poster?

KARL:

Would you like a taxi?

TELEMARKETER:

What?

KARL:

If I wanted a Jonas Brothers poster I would have phoned you, just as you would call a taxi service if you wanted a taxi!

**TELEMARKETER hangs up.**

KARL, NARRATING:

_That works every time. You should try it. But, later…_

MONOGRAM:

Any calls?

KARL:

One from a telemarketer, but I took care of him.

MONOGRAM:

Any word from Agent P?

KARL:

No, sir.

MONOGRAM:

Well, I guess all we can do is wait.

KARL:

And hope, sir.

MONOGRAM:

And hope.

KARL:

And also wait.

MONOGRAM:

I already _did_ wait, Karl!

KARL:

Did we do hope?

KARL, NARRATING:

_What happened next was kinda embarrassing, but I'll show it for your amusement._

**Doorbell rings.**

KARL:

Let's hope it's Agent P!

**PERSON WITH TROUT AND A BOOK comes in.**

KARL:

Can we help you?

**PERSON WITH TROUT AND A BOOK hits KARL over the head with the book.**

PERSON:

All Disney cartoons die!!!

KARL:

Aaaaah! Get the madman off me!

**PERSON slaps KARL around a bit with the trout.**

PERSON:

DIE, DISNEY CARTOON, DIE!

KARL:

Get him off meeeeee!

**KARL gets pulled outside by PERSON.**

KARL:

Mommeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

**Fighting noises come from outside.**

KARL:

OW! OUCH! AAAAAAAGH! AAAAAAAAAAH! HELP!

**Running noises**

**KARL comes in with a black eye, a scape on his cheek and a limp.**

KARL:

I - ow - escaped from - ow - the - ow - madman…ow!

**AGENT D, AGENT KITTY, AGENT C and MONOGRAM stifle their laughter.**

KARL:

You think it's funny?!

MONOGRAM:

Kinda…a bit…

**KARL glares**

MONOGRAM:

Okay, yes!

**KARL shows that he grabbed the trout and the book from the PERSON.**

MONOGRAM:

Uh-oh!

**Screen is blacked out because of BIG FIGHTING GOING ON NOT FOR YOUNGER VIEWERS! FOR THE UNCENSORED SEE CHAPTER 2!**

KARL, NARRATING:

_Okay, that's what happened. Hope you enjoyed it…not…Okay, we stopped fighting after a while and started to get bored. Then the embarrassing song happened._

MONOGRAM:

And the cat goes…

AGENT KITTY:

Meow!

MONOGRAM:

And the doggy goes…

AGENT D:

Woof!

MONOGRAM:

And the owl goes…

AGENT O:

Hoo!

MONOGRAM:

And the turkey goes…

**(silence)**

MONOGRAM:

And the turkey goes…

KARL:

Um…sir? We lost Agent T last November.

MONOGRAM:

Oh, right.

KARL, NARRATING:

_Oh, man, that was embarrassing. It even made its way on national TV. For those of you who watch Disney channel, you know what I'm talking about. So, after a few rounds of that song, we got bored again. So then I got an idea._

KARL:

I have an idea!

MONOGRAM:

Oh, no.

KARL:

No this is a good one! Okay, here it goes. I have a useful contact to a great singer. My friend Illustrious-Crackpot says she knows a girl who's a great singer. And that same girl loves me too!

MONOGRAM:

Who might this girl be?

**KARL pulls BRANDIE out of nowhere.**

KARL:

This girl!

BRANDIE:

Hi-hi!

BRANDIE, NARRATING:

_Just so you know, I WAS there! I just left before Perry came by!_

KARL, NARRATING:

_Ahem! Who's telling the story? ME! Anyways, she sang a few songs. One of which ended up being a duet. She and I sang Sharpay's version of What I've Been Looking For. I had fun. Then Brandie left and Agent P came. After he left and we cleared Mr. Flynn-Fletcher's traffic ticket, I didn't even get home before I fell asleep. I just collapsed and slept right on the floor._

KARL:

Wow, what a late night!

MONOGRAM:

We'd better get ho-

**THUMP!**

**MONOGRAM looks around.**

**KARL had fallen asleep on the floor.**

MONOGRAM:

Sometimes I wonder about you.

KARL, NARRATING:

_That was when we ended up waiting for Agent P. All was well again, and the, erm…danger…had been neutralized…the end._

**A/N: Ending ended up crappy again. At least, in my view. Sorry about slipping myself into the story. I couldn't resist. So…(dodges the tomatoes that are thrown at her) criticism accepted as harsh as it comes!**


End file.
